Recently, a 50-something potential business coaching client of VIM Executive Coaching, walked into our office, head down and rather forlorn. It was as though the weight of the executive leadership world had landed squarely on her shoulders. While she had not yet made it to the C-Suite, her resume and accomplishments in her industry had been quite impressive.
She sat across from us at the conference table and while not “emotional,” (a dreadful stereotype often, far too wrongly applied to women in business) was clearly dejected over something that was happening in her organization.
“I’m lost,” she said. “My company is being acquired and despite our best efforts, I can’t stop it. It has never happened to me before.”
We explored a bit, learning a bit more about her company, and told her to simply breathe and be with us in the moment.
For we know that when an organization is about to undergo an acquisition, the change can be devastating especially if the executive has been devoted and steadfast in carrying out the company’s mission. During and after the pandemic, the numbers of mergers and acquisitions skyrocketed.
So, what now?
While it was clear that she had hoped to build a solid and expanding career in the organization, she had not planned on the rapid (and unfortunate) transformation of her company from 2020 to 2022. It seemed over. She would be made redundant. It was time to move on and begin a new chapter. That can be tough.
While she certainly had a solid skill-set and glowing recommendations, it was apparent that she clung to a vision and a hope rather than the reality of what had been taking place around her. The more she and her people struggled against the inevitable, the more it had become apparent that she lacked but one important element: mindfulness.
“I think I always saw it coming,” she confided, “but I didn’t want to see it or believe it. I lost staff, I saw the declines, I refused to understand that after a while it made no difference how many hours I put in or how many ways I could crunch the numbers and arrive at the same result.”
VIM Executive Coaching does not judge. We counsel executive leaders in all of the times of their careers.
We gently re-directed her, “You may blame yourself for your strong sense of loyalty or your passion for the job, but please don’t think those are negative qualities. If anything, blame yourself for not wanting to fully see the picture.”
As to the “what now,” we wanted to more fully explore the concept of mindfulness with her.
Mindfulness and mindfulness meditation teach us to dwell in what is, and to function in real time. In order to be mindful, we must function in the present and not how we would like things to be. We can’t be mindful without being authentic, not can we be mindful without being compassionate.
The mindful executive leader functions in the moment, conducts interactions with others in the moment, and processes what is going on in the light of what is truly being experienced.
While our new client had tremendous qualities, she had refused for far too long to not see what she couldn’t see. She may not have been aware of every phase of what her organization had been experiencing, but she certainly saw enough, experienced enough and received enough feedback to understand things were not good. She over-rode the obvious.
Of mindfulness
The problem with “fantasy” or denial or even built-in predispositions, is that they are either forward or backward leaning. Mindfulness is neither cynical about the prior nor fearful about what may happen, but to be in each moment and to accordingly respond. Even after she began to lose trusted co-workers who told her that they saw the handwriting on the wall, she didn’t believe them. It is understandable but, it is not mindful. She was being inauthentic and uncompassionate toward herself.
She was “lost,” but through mindfulness, she can easily begin to find herself. Through business coaching and mindfulness, she will soon find a terrific, successful executive leader. All of the tools she needs are there; she must only believe they were always within sight, only hidden in imaginary expectations.