We have, unfortunately, seen them all, from desperado “outlaws” to ronin’s to strong silent types to fiercely independent. Rather than celebrating them, VIM Executive Coaching has also wondered why?
Before launching into the question of why do so many leaders refuse help? We need a point of order. We certainly understand – and agree – that there is nothing wrong with making decisions and we also know that it truly is “lonely at the top.” The final opinion sometimes has to be the executive leader or any other creative name assigned to that person in the modern workplace.
The clarification aside, we need to repeat the question. As the workplace has changed and executive leaders need more input rather than less, why is there an insistence that accepting help is somehow related to weakness or confusion?
It goes back a long way
The world of business has long been a bastion of desk-pounding, vein-bulging, bug-eyed glaring leadership where executive leaders had been led to believe that the more control the better. The leader, against all common sense, saw an outcome, stuck to that outcome and brushed aside any further input other than as accommodation.
Unfortunately, the same leaders would often blame subordinates for failures: “You told me this, and I followed your advice!” or its twin blame, “What were you thinking when you told me that?” Even logical explanations; numbers, spreadsheets and such, don’t seem to dissuade an executive leader from falling back on the blame game.
Is it worth it to so tightly grip onto power? Of course not.
In truth, no great executive leader ever “did it alone.” And while, concepts of leadership have surely shifted, there is no doubt that the fiercely independents and the strong silent types still exist. They may look different than the cigar-chomping parodies of decades ago, but they are clearly still around. In fact, intense egos have never gone out of fashion.
Of course, a sense of fear is often behind this. The workplace was often seen as a pressure cooker, dog-eat-dog, “my way of the highway” world. Any executive leader growing up in that environment was shaped by it. It became impossible to change.
By the way, we have seen the same behavior with women as with men; in the arts as well as in the sciences or technology. And, surprisingly, regardless of age. If we are honest, extreme silo thinking is the domain of those who refuse all sorts of help. It does lead to an isolation of policy, outlook, innovation and creativity.
A new proposition
VIM Executive Coaching, among other skills, teaches mindfulness. In many ways, mindfulness is the enemy of intractability and egotism.
Mindfulness doesn’t say “You, over there, give up all of your power!”
Rather, mindfulness requires of the executive leader an openness to change, an acceptance of input, a consideration of many possibilities and outcomes. If the old way of doing things was essentially a trap and a solitary place, mindfulness allows greater authenticity to be willing to admit that in the modern organization no one has all of the answers. For, we are interdependent, and the greatest outcomes can be achieved when that interdependency is honored and enhanced.
No one ever had all of the answers, and whenever leadership refused all help, it generally led to poor outcomes. There are more than enough opportunities and clearly more than enough obstacles and challenges. Mindfulness honors all of it, and ultimately, honors the executive leader who knows it.