"Leaders who don't listen will eventually be surrounded by people who have nothing to say."
~Andy Stanley, Author and Pastor
VIM Executive Coaching is hardly the only organization that has wondered where listening skills have gone. Numerous business magazines, podcasts and business school courses have devoted themselves to the subject of listening skills. A common lament of our clients is that “no one listens to me,” and that’s just the tip of the iceberg.
Recent studies have shown that 57% of employees have left their jobs because they are frustrated with their manager or company leadership. What frustrates them most about their leadership? No one ever listens to them; not in meetings or on teams; not one on one or virtually.
When the lack of listening becomes a constant problem, employees leave. The old saying that says, “People leave bosses, not companies,” is true. And, if it sounds circular, it is. No one is listening and because no one listens, the frustration levels rise and people walk.
Break the Cycle
A 2023 article in Psychology Today is one of many that talks to people being unfocused while listening to others. It is not that people don’t care, it seems more like they are quickly disengaged and unfocused.
We live in a time overrun with clutter, opinion, anger, judgment, shaming and self-righteousness. Is it “our fault?” Not necessarily. Modern day communication is geared to either outrage or over-the-top defense of the views of others.
When was the last time that “fair and balanced” actually, meant fair and balanced? We can’t say. Whether we are talking cable news, social media or even network news, most people talk at issues never to issues. Worse, most of our friends and selected work colleagues live “in silos.” Most individuals like to hear the echo of their own voices and will hardly consider other views. Adding to the problem, is that feelings and not study or research rule the day.
To believe that executive leaders don’t carry these traits into the work place is erroneous. Those who don’t listen in their personal lives usually don’t listen at work. Whether, in-person, virtual or hybrid, the art of listening has been crushed to overwhelming stressors.
At the center of it all, is mindfulness. Executive leaders, as a group, have lost mindfulness. Organizations as prestigious as the National Institutes for Health have long understood that with the decline in mindfulness people have lost authenticity, compassion and connection.
In the angry game of reaction, rather than response, hundreds of thousands of valued employees have moved on from their organizations. While we try to be as open-minded as possible as the reason for this migration, it is impossible to ignore the fact that one of the most cited reasons is that they were ignored.
Had just a portion of executive leaders committed themselves to mindfulness training, mindfulness meditation and taking their listening skills seriously, a great deal of the job turnover could have been avoided.
We cannot predict the future of the work environment. It still seems rather up in the air. We can say that without an improvement in listening skills and greater mindfulness, many organizations will be doomed to continued turnover and employee dissatisfaction.
Mindfulness is nothing new
While a cultivation of mindfulness goes back to ancient times, much of the skills involved with mindfulness, being present, and listening, have been lost. The business world has been all the worse for it.
We believe the skills of mindfulness and true listening need to be rekindled. It is the only way to cut through the clutter that prevents the act of true, human connection in the work place as well as life. If the art of listening has been lost, we believe it must urgently be revived.