At VIM Executive Coaching, our new clients have come to us from every possible background and have drawn upon their inspiration for leadership from most every possible source. You know what? We love it! Our clients never cease to amaze us with their expertise, hobbies and interests. If we haven’t expressed it before, the beauty of our coaching is that we, in turn, are always gifted with new insights and knowledge of things we never knew before; from professional football to biotech; from hi-tech to architecture.
Not too Surprising
So, it was not too surprising when an executive leader came to us who had a background in entertainment and film. She shared upon our initial meeting that she often managed using movies as inspiration.
“You realize, that ‘Hollywood’ isn’t exactly real life.”
“Oh, I know that,” she smiled, “but I am always envious of those high-powered executives who can lead without emotion. They never get personal. They keep it to strictly business and then go home.”
While the intent of what she was saying was understandable, as we began the coaching process, she would come to realize that VIM Executive Coaching takes the opposite approach. While countless movies glorify the executive who calmly sits at his or her desk or cubicle and addresses all problems with dispassion, it does not translate into everyday practice. The approach is flawed. Even negotiation, a vital skill for any executive leader, is not strictly a matter of numbers; there is a measure of understanding – even compassion that is part of the equation.
We believe it is neither dispassion or analytical skills that attract us to the so-called image of the unemotional executive, instead a response rather than harsh or inappropriate reaction.
It is virtually impossible to inspire, lead, manage or direct a company or a department for that matter, by acting as an automaton. Let’s not forget that while we might admire an actor who plays such a role in a movie, when the filming stops the same actor deals with a hundred stressors of life the same as the rest of us.
Response from Within
The executive leader can be reserved if that is her style, or thoughtful or even measured in words and actions, but that is hardly the same as lacking compassion or not wanting to get involved.
Even if the response is a quiet one, or limited to a few, well-thought sentences, if it comes from intention and authenticity, it is valid and has great meaning. The “trick,” though hardly deception, is to come from mindfulness; to lead from mindfulness. The mindful response is authentic.
The theatrical images of the well-coiffed executive leader, dictating terms and forcefully imposing will, has never worked. It may look good, or read good, or make for an “impressive,” two-dimensional character, but it is hollow in intent and even in dialog.
In the end, being real is far superior to robotic. We can “admire” Meryl Streep or Richard Gere or even Sopranos re-runs when someone tells us it’s all about business, but in executive leadership it is never “just business.” Somewhere in the equation, dwells the human heart.