Though this true story goes back a few years, it is still relevant in these somewhat turbulent times and in fact, may remind us all of an important reality.
“I guess you think I should retire – and be done with it,” shared an executive who made an appointment for his complimentary session.
He had come to us, allegedly, to ask us if we thought a 65-year-old executive facing the end of a career chapter should (in his words) “Grab a chair and a fishing pole and sit on a dock!”
It is not our place
His company was going through many changes and his division was being spun off and merged into the operations of a competitor. He felt he was about to see “the writing on the wall.” He felt the new company would carry him for a month, maybe two, drain him of his knowledge and then let him go.
“Back in 1974 when I was starting out as a software engineer, there was still loyalty. I worked with men who were, believe it or not, World War Two veterans. We were there at the start.”
Interestingly, in the first ten minutes of our conversation he made two references to the nineteen-seventies, one to the nineteen-eighties and a few glancing mentions to 1998, when he rolled out a new generation of printers.
“I loved my team. Good, solid men. Good guys. Family men with values.”
He noted that everything in the workplace had changed but he still wanted to be useful.
As he talked, we made notes. It was not only the dates that were troubling. It was the constant use of those dates as touchstones. Then we had concerns about references to working with “Family men with values.”
He said it was just an expression. He worked with women too. There were no problems. In fact, his daughter was enjoying a successful career in the pharmaceutical industry.
But what did he mean about values? He assured us the values he talked of were “Honesty,” “Integrity,” and the like. They did not refer to gender, sexual orientation, race or religion.
Then he repeated “When I was starting out, we didn’t worry about all of this.”
It was not our place to tell him to go on, or to retire, but it was our place to remind him that 1974 was a long time ago, that change was inevitable and it was long overdue. Did he understand that it was, in fact, overdue?
Red Flags
He conceded that while he didn’t always understand what was transpiring in the workplace, he nodded and expressed that the workplace did need to be more open. Maybe in 1974 with the old veterans they couldn’t see it, but I think I can.
“You know, 1974 no longer exists,” we gently chided.
“What do you mean?”
This is where his dilemma as an executive was fully exposed. It is not the first time we encountered an older executive who refused to live in the present moment. Remarkably, this particular executive (by virtue of his industry) was quite computer savvy. However, we note that far too many, even in HR, are preoccupied with tools and not with mindset.
If his mindset was stuck in the past, it made no difference what kinds of tools were in his skill-set toolbox.
We have, all of us, only this present moment. If we are authentic in the moment and mindful in this moment, we do have the opportunity to continue in a career or launch a new career. We can pay a certain amount of homage to the past, and we can look forward to a future event, but what we have is now.
“You can live in 1974 or 2020. If your choice is 1974, grab that chair and enjoy the sound of the water against the dock. If your choice is 2020, be in 2020 and enjoy the moment.”
“It is a Catch-22,” he conceded.
There are no guarantees, we explained. We can help you, as an executive leader, to be more in the now and less in the then.
We started to work with him and true to his prediction, he was let go for “being redundant.” He received an attractive severance and chose a middle path. He had an idea for a small business in a related field and due to his track record, he launched his own venture.
Perhaps the most successful thing about his life has nothing to do with his company. It is that whenever we talk, he is mindful and in the present. There are no longer references to a past that cannot be re-captured, just the present moments to be savored.